BLUE FUNK

Cook. Wash Dishes. Wash clothes. Fold clothes. Change diapers. Repeat.

Sometimes, it feels like those are all the things she does. How inconsequential. How routine. She will look at herself, her unglamorous self, feel inadequate and descend into a blue funk. Through the blue prism, she sees her friends wearing clothes with names wondering which shoes or bag to go with what, or what next plane to hop into, and talking about career milestones.

There was a time when she lived just like the women she knew. She would go to work, sit before a computer when there were no clients to meet, read tons of legal documents, plod through the day, meet friends after work, sleep (a little), go to work. Repeat. “Empty.” She thought of her life. She would sink into a blue state and  from there  looked at married colleagues and friends and would say – “I wish I have my own family.” Her wish came true. She got married and chose to leave the life that would have let her wear clothes with names and hop on a plane when she wanted to.

Now older and wiser, she realizes that whatever state of life one is in, there will be times of discontent. There will always be those days when things get overwhelming and she will wish to be somewhere where life seems easier and more glamorous. Yet she knows, in the recesses of her heart, that even in her funk, she will still choose washing dishes, folding laundry, changing diapers, and cooking dinners as her life motif. In this, her world, she has realized her dreams and has found joy. More importantly, through those little inconsequential chores, she loves.

Soon, she will hear her child, whose bottom she just cleaned, giggle and  her world will be right again.
_____________________________

The above piece was written for

Trifecta: Week Thirty-Two.

The challenge this week was to write a response between 33 and 333 words to the word “BLUE”, i.e.,3  a : low in spirits : melancholy
    b : marked by low spirits : depressing <a blue funk> <things looked blue>

Thank you for dropping by.  Have a great day.

~Imelda

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26 comments

  1. Wow, can really relate to this one! I always feel like a brat when I think this way; yes, when I was single I envied the married mommas. Now I’m married and a momma and I get sick to death of the daily dishes and laundry and mindlessness of it all. The reason I blog! But no, I wouldn’t trade it either. You’d think at 49 I’d be old and mature enough to know life is never perfect.

    • And you are not alone. My husband sometimes wonders if he has a braty teenager on his hands during one of my funks. 🙂 And this is one of the reasons why I blog too – something else to do aside from changing diapers. 😀

    • Thank you, Colleen, for the nice words. 🙂 I have gotten better with these feelings over the years. Sometimes, the isolation can be overwhelming though.

    • Thanks, ODNT for the visit and the lovely comment. 🙂 That perspective is easy to accept in the head, but difficult to sink in in the heart sometimes.

  2. This is terrific! (In a blue sort of way, of course :)) It seems a part of us will yearn for what we don’t have if we don’t stop to appreciate the joys in our life.

    • Thank you, Janna, for visiting and the nice comment. Yeah, I suppose there will always be that. One just has to stop looking at other’s fortunes, or misfortunes that matter.

  3. I can relate to that feeling too. And I can relate to the knowing that the grass is always greener elsewhere. But sometimes it doesn’t feel that way and those times sure are blue.
    Thanks for linking up. Don’t forget to come back tomorrow for the new challenge.

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